Recycling
lswoteccl 2:13
"A Government big enough to give you every thing you want, is big enough to take away every thing you have."
......Thomas Jefferson......
Re: Recycling
I hope that's synthehol! 
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When I went to get my driver's license renewed, our local motor-vehicle bureau was packed. The line inched along for almost an hour until the man ahead of me finally got his license.
He inspected his photo for a moment and commented to the clerk, "I was standing in line so long, I ended up looking pretty grouchy in this picture."
The woman beside him peered over his shoulder, then reassured him, "It's okay. That's how you're going to look when the cops pull you over anyway."
*************
Henry
When I went to get my driver's license renewed, our local motor-vehicle bureau was packed. The line inched along for almost an hour until the man ahead of me finally got his license.
He inspected his photo for a moment and commented to the clerk, "I was standing in line so long, I ended up looking pretty grouchy in this picture."
The woman beside him peered over his shoulder, then reassured him, "It's okay. That's how you're going to look when the cops pull you over anyway."
*************
Henry
Re: Recycling
lswoteccl 2:13
"A Government big enough to give you every thing you want, is big enough to take away every thing you have."
......Thomas Jefferson......
Re: Recycling
lswoteccl 2:13
"A Government big enough to give you every thing you want, is big enough to take away every thing you have."
......Thomas Jefferson......
A young man with a few hours to spare one afternoon figures that if he hurries and plays fast, he can get in nine holes before he has to head home.
As he is about to tee-off, an old gentleman shuffles onto the tee and asks if he can join him. Although worried about the old man slowing him down against an already tight schedule, the young man knows it is proper golf manners to allow this...and says, please join him to the stranger.
To his surprise, the old man plays quickly. He doesn't hit the ball very far, but it goes straight. Furthermore, the old man moves along pretty good and without wasting any time is always ready to hit the ball when his turn comes.
When they reach the ninth fairway, the young man is facing a tough shot. A large pine tree sits directly in front of him and in the path he his ball must travel to hit on the green.
After several minutes pondering how to hit the shot and what club to use, the old man says... "You know, when I was your age, I'd hit the ball right over that tree with my 6 iron!"
With the challenge before him, the young man swings hard, hits the ball, watches it fly into the branches, rattle around and land with a thud a the foot of the tree, only a few feet from where it had started.
"Of course," said the old man, "when I was your age, that tree was only three feet tall!"
********
Henry
As he is about to tee-off, an old gentleman shuffles onto the tee and asks if he can join him. Although worried about the old man slowing him down against an already tight schedule, the young man knows it is proper golf manners to allow this...and says, please join him to the stranger.
To his surprise, the old man plays quickly. He doesn't hit the ball very far, but it goes straight. Furthermore, the old man moves along pretty good and without wasting any time is always ready to hit the ball when his turn comes.
When they reach the ninth fairway, the young man is facing a tough shot. A large pine tree sits directly in front of him and in the path he his ball must travel to hit on the green.
After several minutes pondering how to hit the shot and what club to use, the old man says... "You know, when I was your age, I'd hit the ball right over that tree with my 6 iron!"
With the challenge before him, the young man swings hard, hits the ball, watches it fly into the branches, rattle around and land with a thud a the foot of the tree, only a few feet from where it had started.
"Of course," said the old man, "when I was your age, that tree was only three feet tall!"
********
Henry
Negotiations between union members and their employer were at an impasse. The union denied that their workers were flagrantly abusing their contract's sick-leave provisions.
One morning at the bargaining table, the company's chief negotiator held aloft the morning edition of the newspaper, "This man," he announced, "Called in Sick yesterday!"
There on the sports page, was a photo of the supposedly ill employee, who had just won a local golf tournament with an excellent score.
The silence in the room was broken by a union negotiator. "Wow," he said. "Think of what kind of score he could have had if he hadn't been sick!"
*********
Henry
One morning at the bargaining table, the company's chief negotiator held aloft the morning edition of the newspaper, "This man," he announced, "Called in Sick yesterday!"
There on the sports page, was a photo of the supposedly ill employee, who had just won a local golf tournament with an excellent score.
The silence in the room was broken by a union negotiator. "Wow," he said. "Think of what kind of score he could have had if he hadn't been sick!"
*********
Henry
A guy stood over his tee shot for what seemed an eternity; looking up, looking down, measuring the distance, figuring the wind direction and speed. Driving his partner nuts.
Finally his exasperated partner says, "What's taking so long? Hit the blasted ball."
The guy answers, "My wife is up there watching me from the clubhouse. I want to make this a perfect shot."
"Forget it, you don't stand a chance of hitting her from here."
********
Henry
Finally his exasperated partner says, "What's taking so long? Hit the blasted ball."
The guy answers, "My wife is up there watching me from the clubhouse. I want to make this a perfect shot."
"Forget it, you don't stand a chance of hitting her from here."
********
Henry
Re: Recycling
lswoteccl 2:13
"A Government big enough to give you every thing you want, is big enough to take away every thing you have."
......Thomas Jefferson......
Re: Recycling
FORE!
five?
five?
Re: Recycling
Happy pi day!
Re: Recycling
lswoteccl 2:13
"A Government big enough to give you every thing you want, is big enough to take away every thing you have."
......Thomas Jefferson......
Q: What's the difference between an angry circus owner and a Roman barber?
A: One is a raving showman, and the other is a shaving Roman.
******
In ancient Rome, deli workers were told that they could eat anything they wanted during the lunch hour. Anything, that is except the smoked salmon. Thus were created the world's first anti-lox breaks.
******
Henry
A: One is a raving showman, and the other is a shaving Roman.
******
In ancient Rome, deli workers were told that they could eat anything they wanted during the lunch hour. Anything, that is except the smoked salmon. Thus were created the world's first anti-lox breaks.
******
Henry